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 1012 - SQUIRM with short: A CASE OF SPRING FEVER
Genre: Horror (1976,
Color)
Memorable Movie Line: “Mr.
Beardsley!”
Don’s Short summary: This experiment begins with the final short
ever see on MST.
This one is about a middle-aged slow-looking guy who, frustrated
while trying to fix his couch, wishes that there were no springs in the world.
All of a sudden, the Spring Sprite Coily shows up and grants his wish.
So now, nothing works anymore – the phone is broken, the car, the
door, etc. because of the lack of springs. The guy, regretting his wish, begs the Spring Sprite to return springs to the world, which it does but warning him to never wish this again.
Obviously, this guy is in serious need of psychiatric help but, instead, he goes golfing with his three much younger golf buddies.
And, the entire time the foursome is on the golf course, the now-insane man babbles on about springs.
Soon, his three buddies get so sick of his babbling, that they beat him to death with their golf clubs.
No, not really – but they definitely wanted to! Eventually the other three men are able to get away from the insane babbling-about-springs man and this short mercifully ends.
Don’s synopsis: In a mini-trend of Season Ten, the feature in this episode is another movie set in the South, this time set in Georgia (my state!).
Please don’t let all of these awful southern rednecky movies from this season distort your view of the South
– it’s really not that bad... if you stay in the cities, that
is.
The movie opens as a storm knocks down power lines and they are
then apparently electrifying the ground, driving the worms down there crazy
(I’d go crazy too if
hundreds of volts were shot up my bum!).
Next we see a pale, white wimpy urban guy named Mick heading home to rural Georgia soon after the huge storm.
He is picked up by Gerri, who his old girlfriend or cousin or something, in a worm truck she borrowed from the inbred local, Roger, son of a worm farmer.
But no sooner than you can spit your chaw, though, does Mick run into some trouble with the local redneck sheriff, who
doesn’t like city
folk, particularly wimpy pale white guys. When Mick and Gerri return the worm truck, all of the worms are gone, having been driven crazy by
all of the electricity in the ground (...but if the electricity was in the ground, and the worms were in the truck, why would it bother them at all?
Sorry, I’m using logic here – my mistake). Soon, a skeleton appears at the Beardsley house and, lo and behold,
it’s Mr.
Beardsley!
The worms are now massing in attack – they first attack the inbred Roger (and actually improve his appearance) and
also kill his worm farmer father/brother (you knew they would get revenge on
him, their former slave-driver). A virtual sea of worms invades homes and the local town
– we even get a worm-cam
view of things, so we can see what the worms see (...but aren’t worms blind?
Oops, sorry, there I go using logic again).
This rippling sea of worms sucks anyone who falls into it down like quicksand.
But the worms are afraid of light and, for some reason, can’t climb trees.
So Mick and Gerri survive by climbing into a tree and staying all night.
The next morning, the incomprehensible power company man tells them that the power is fixed (I think
that’s what he said), so the worms have returned to their underground home at least until the next big
storm/sequel.
Don’s Review: This was one awful movie –
it’s probably the worse thing to happen to Georgia since Sherman marched through
(and Maltin gave this piece of crap movie three stars – what an idiot!).
The riffing, though, is excellent throughout, as M&tBs do a great job of added hilarious southern riffs to the movie (I especially liked the Scarlet
O’Hara riffs whenever
a Southern Belle appears in the film).
And, although the Mad segments and the final segment were both too silly, the rest of the host segments were actually pretty funny.
So this, the second to last experiment, is a rather good MST
episode.
Trivia Note: The short A
Case of Spring Fever was the inspiration for the Waffle
skits during episode 317-Viking Women and The Sea Serpent.
Don’s Rating:
[ S:
F:
]
Forrest’s Short summary:
This short shows us the importance of springs. Basically, springs are everywhere, and you better like them, or else, an evil cartoon elf will knock on your door and scare the hell out of you.
Forrest’s Synopsis:
This delightful, three star rip off of Alfred Hitchcock’s The
Birds, tells to story, of the muffin-headed, antique obsessed, and unusually pale Nick, his ever more pale, skinny and annoying girlfriend Gerri, and of course the loveable man who grew up on non stop viewings of
Deliverance, Roger. It’s the typical love triangle.
Nick wants Gerri because, her being a skeleton, would go great with his antique collection, and Roger wants Gerri, so he can give her a !SU!prise.
A dilly of a storm, with more thunderin’ and lite-nin’ you ever sawed in yer life, knocks out all the electricity in the dangerously southern town of Fly Creek.
Of course, I expected killer flies, but the movie disappoints me with worms, which have become millipedes thanks to the storm, and with the helpful, and delightful, cameo by Gamera, who knocks over a telephone pole, which turns the worms into evil, blood sucking monsters.
Nick arrives at Fly Creek, all the way from the north, and meets up with Gerri, the only walking, breathing, talking skeleton on earth besides him.
Roger, who runs a worm farm with his even more southern father, lets them borrow his truck, but he says to be careful, after all, there is three bucks of worms on board.
But the worms escape, and of course, Roger gets the blame. We are also introduced to Sheriff Pink, as Crow puts it, who is perhaps even more southern than Crenshaw and Roger put together, who
doesn’t like bull in Fly Creek, and inherently hates people from the north.
So, after Roger is hurt mentally and physically by his inbred dad, Geri and Nick decide to invite him to go fishing (oh,
here’s a good idea, let’s invite a psychopath into the deep woods, where he can kill us, molest us, and then eat us, and nobody would ever know).
After Roger tells a chilling tale of the worms (which is chilling because of how scary his accent is), Nick leaves Geri alone with him, oblivious that
he’s leaving his girlfriend with an escaped convict, who’s idol in Freddy
Krueger. Roger then tries to give Gerri her !SU!prise (aka
surprise) which is a much more polite way of saying “I’m going to molest
you”, but the worms trip him just in time, and he becomes the worm face (and even though Roger claims that Nick is the worm face, I think we can all agree that Roger is the WORM FACE).
Bad things happen, as plastic worms and millipedes overrun the city.
People die, but we
don’t care about them anyway. The movie ends with the fact that
Gerri’s sister survived the worm attack, which is supposed to be heart warming, but disappoints me.
I may have given it three stars as well as Leonard Maltin, but I
didn’t get to see the big sister’s guts eaten, thus, I give it negative four stars.
Why did the worms attack? The answer is never clear.
One thing that is clear is that I liked this film much more when it was called
The Birds.
Forrest’s Review:
The riffing is near perfection on this crappy, but oddly enough, surprisingly watchable movie.
This movie has always been a favorite of mine on the show, and it continues to be.
The riffing is brilliant, and provides a commentary that had me laughing out loud frequently, with plenty of moments that bust my gut.
The short however, even though goofy on its own, doesn’t provide much gut burstingly funny riffs, and
doesn’t repeat all that well, and thus will take down the rating of this experiment.
The host segments are mixed, with some things being rather lame, with others being outstandingly clever and funny.
Great episode that ages well, with a short that doesn’t age well.
Forrest’s Rating:
[ S: 
F: 
]
Related Link:
(1) BadMovies.org
(Movie Review)
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