 807 - TERROR FROM THE YEAR 5000
Genre: Low-Budget Horror (1958, B&W)
Synopsis: Some researchers in a swampy area of Florida are experimenting with a time machine.
They are able to bring back a statue from an unknown time and so they send it off to be carbon-dated by a smart scientist and his dumb woman assistant.
The scientist dates the statue ahead to the year 5200 (by using carbon-dating...
yeah, right).
He also discovers that the statue is highly radioactive so he goes down to visit the Florida researchers to find out
what’s going on.
The older researcher isn’t surprised to find out that the statue was radioactive and agrees to stop the research but the younger researcher thinks that they need to continue.
Meanwhile the smart scientist spends all of his time swimming in the local pond and finds a chest with a dead monkey in it that he completely obsesses about (although it was have nothing to do with the rest of the plot).
He also is moving in on the young researcher’s girl so the young researcher tries unsuccessfully to kill him while
he’s swimming (although, for some reason, the
smart scientist doesn’t take it personally). The young researcher is secretly continuing the research while a creepy guy at the house is busy peeping at the young woman.
Eventually the young researcher succeeds at bringing some creature back from the future but he gets sick from his exposure to the radiation.
The creature turns out to be a woman in a black suit with shiny little mirrors on it, a bit like a disco ball.
She kills the peeping tom creepy guy and also kills a nurse who stupidly walks through the swamp, and takes
the nurse’s place. The future woman (Miss Terror or Mrs. Terror?) dressed as the nurse tells the young researcher that they need him in the future to save them.
He agrees to go with her but before they can enter the time machine, the others interrupt
them. They rip off the future woman’s mask, showing how freakishly goofy she really looks and the future woman and the young researcher are both killed when the time machine electrocutes
them both.
Don’s Review: Another movie with a title that
doesn’t fit: the Terror was anything but terrifying and
it was from the year 52xx, not 5000. Bad movie but at least the riffs were fairly decent. Plus the host segments were rather enjoyable, particularly one in which a good sounding song called “When I Held Your Brain in My Arms” was sung by the Observers (although the
far too-topical “Suddenly Susan” line should have been left out).
This is a reasonably enjoyable episode that’s worth checking out.
Don’s Rating: 
Forrest’s Review: This, to me, was a great episode, and another classic in the thoroughly excellent
Season Eight. The monster in this film is so goofy, and so inane, than just the look of it had me on the floor crying from laughing.
The totally out of place moral of the film also had me on the floor.
It was the most out of place moral in an MST episode since Eegah in
Season Five. The riffing was fast paced and hilarious for the most part, especially the riffs on Angelo, which is the Mickey of season eight, and the host segments were lots of fun.
Gotta love that song by the Observers. However, even though Mike, who was dressed up as an Observer for this episode, was singing the song, it sounded more like Kevin
Murphy’s voice (???). Don, give Season Eight another chance.
Forrest’s Rating: 
Related Link:
(1) The
Agony Booth (Humorous Movie Review)
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