MST3K Review

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706 - LASERBLAST

Genre: Sci-Fi / Teen Revenge Film (1978, Color)

Synopsis: This movie, which should have been called Loserblast, opens as a green alien guy with a laser gun attached to his arm is wandering through a California desert when a spaceship shows up with two alien creatures (done using cool looking stop-motion effects that, unfortunately, is the only cool thing in this whole film). The two aliens have a shoot-out with the green guy and they kill him but – for plot reasons – leave behind his laser gun. Meanwhile, we are introduced to a ’70s style dude who, unfortunately, turns out to be the main character of this movie. He has a girlfriend who lives with her domineering old coot grandfather and he is also harassed by a couple of guys who are even bigger losers than he is (one is even played by the most annoying geek in movie history: Eddie Deezen!). Our main dude, after being harassed by the local stoned police (who, in comparison, make the police on the Dukes of Hazzard look like Elliott Ness’ Untouchables), heads out to the desert where he find the laser gun left by the aliens. He picks it up and begins to enjoy firing it. But the gun is also changing him, somehow implanting a metal thingy in his chest and every once and while, turning him green to go out and take some laser blasting revenge out on people who have done him wrong (even though no one in this movie actually treated him that badly). So loserboy goes on a blasting spree and blasts everyone who has messed with him: a doctor played by an embarrassed Roddy MacDowell; a Star Wars sign (as this movie symbolically – and rather inexplicably – claims to be better than that film); and – YES! – Eddie Deezen! Finally, the two cool-looking aliens return and take out the loser. (But the aliens still leave the laser gun behind! Does this mean there will be a sequel??? OH, THE HUMANITY!!!)

Host Segments:

Prologue: Crow and Tom tie up Mike
Segment One: Dr. Forrester loses his funding and cuts the SOL loose
Segment Two: Nomad, I mean Monad, visits the SOL
Segment Three: SOL runs into Star Babies
Segment Four: Mike is Captain Janeway
Segment Five (End): SOL crew turns into pure energy at edge of the universe; Dr Forrester regresses into childhood (literally!)

Don’s Review: This was a rather dull movie that I actually remember being advertised when it was released in the late ’70s. It even was hyped as a Star Wars like sci-fi film, but about the only similarities I can seen between the two movies is that they both have laser guns in them and they both were shot on film stock. And oh, yes, another similarity is they were both filmed using cameras! The riffing is pretty good throughout while the host segments varied a bit. The segments mainly dealt with the shutdown of Deep 13 and Dr. F setting the SOL free, but a couple had a Star Trek theme (the good one was a hilarious take-off of the old Star Trek episode “The Changeling” while the other was a bizarre take-off of one of the newer Star Treks with Mike in drag as that woman captain) and the final segment was a dead-on take-off of the finale to 2001: A Space Odyssey as Dr. F ages before his very own eyes and, after touching a monolithic video of the worst movie ever made, is transformed into a bespectacled starchild (complete with diapers!). Worth-seeing mainly for the end of the great Comedy Central Era, but this really is not one of the better episodes of the show (why it placed so high on the MST fans’ Rhino poll makes almost as much sense as why Leonard Martin gave Laserblast 2.5 out of 4 stars).

Don’s Rating:

Forrest’s Review: What a pleasant surprise this episode was! I had watched this episode a long, long time ago, and frankly, I thought it was very poor. But then, just last night, I popped in my Laserblast DVD, and I laughed like an idiot all the way through. The first thing you’ll notice about Laserblast is that there is very, very little dialogue in it. So this is perfect for Mike and the ‘Bots. And Mike and the bots NEVER shut up once during the whole feature, so they are constantly talking, as this episode mixes observational riffs and dialogue riffs exceptionally well. In fact, this of some of the slickest, most perfect, most balanced riffing since Colossus and the Head Hunters! There are a few parts that fell flat for me in this episode, but for the many huge bursts of laughter, this one is a classic! The best part is when the kid in the desert is playing around with the laser gun, Mike and the ‘Bots show no mercy riffing this poor guy. I also like the Jim Carrey riffs when Billy turns into the green guy that looks an awful lot like The Mask. The dope smoking cops were of course an excellent addition, along with many hilarious “ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL!” riffs. But of them all, the riff: “Hey man, I like the flames you painted on you car…oh that’s not right,” was the best. And I thought Crow’s riff: “Hi I’m Max Keller,” was perfect. Billy’s just driving along in his van, and Crow just says: “Hi, I’m Max Keller.” It brought a huge burst of laughter to my face, it was perfect (although you must see Master Ninja to understand it). Also Mike’s riff: “Every time I’m close to not hating him, I see those feet painted on the side of his van.”
The only unfortunate downside to this episode is the host segments. Were this to be an in-the-middle episode, it would have been okay, because the host segments are actually very clever indeed. However, since this may have been the very last episode, the host segments just didn’t seem right. It just ended the show very weirdly. In fact, were this to be the last episode, as hilarious as the riffs were, I’d probably give it 3 CROWS, because the host segments just seem like their not very good for the last episode; the host segments, while clever, are in no way as satisfying as the host segments in Danger: Diabolik for the last episode of the show. But since the Sci-Fi era came along and this wasn’t the last episode, the clever host segments and hilarious riffing get A+ marks! It’s not as good as Night of the Blood Beast, but up there with Escape 2000. What a great season this is!
Trivia Note: This is Dr. Forrester’s very last episode, as well as Dr. Forrester gets the last words: “Oh, poopie.”

Forrest’s Rating: