506 - EEGAH! (RHINO DVD & VHS)

Memorable Movie Line:  “Watch out for snakes!”

Don’s Synopsis:  As the film starts, a girl named Roxy is frightened by a large caveman (Richard Kiel) one night in the desert outside of Palm Springs.  The next day, she returns with her father (Arch Hall Sr.), who’s a professor of something, and her boyfriend Tom (Arch Hall Jr.) and his hair to find the caveman.  The professor is then dropped off in the middle of the desert, while Roxy, Tom & Hair go out later to pick him up in a dune buggy.  But when they get out there to pick Professor Dad up, he’s missing.  Next thing you know, Roxy is kidnapped by the caveman and taken back to his cave, where he is also keeping her father hostage.  The caveman, named “Eegah” because that’s the only thing he can say, introduces them to his family, none of whom are not looking in the best of health, and then he creepily begins to touch Roxy, getting closer and closer to her “bathing suit” region. (Although that scene is nowhere near as disgusting as watching Eegah getting a shave!)  The professor and Roxy escape from Eegah with the help of Tom and his hair.  They all hop into the dune buggy and ride around and around while the caveman Eegah throws rocks at them.  Finally, they get tired of having rocks thrown at them and drive away.  But the caveman wants to see the girl again, so he takes his club and travels to the bright lights of the big city.  There, he wanders around some more and somehow ends up at the professor and Roxy’s home.  They are having some sort of party around the pool out back and the caveman Eegah shows up to try to take the girl.  But the police arrive, fill him full of lead and he falls – William Holden style – into the pool, dead. (Or is he???)

Don’s Review:  Eegah! is considered one of the worst movies ever, which it is.  But some even call it THE worst movie ever, which it isn’t.  The plot seems like it was lifted from King Kong (girl is captured by Kong/Eegah in the wild; girl escapes and returns to civilization; Kong/Eegah chase after girl and are killed) and I wouldn’t be surprised if Eegah’s costume was too.  Watching the movie, it’s hard to decide who’s more disgusting: Eegah or Arch Hall Jr.? (...strike that, it’s easy: Arch Hall Jr.)  And the movie is used to promote the junior Arch Hall’s singing career, so we unfortunately have to listen to him sing... three times! (BTW, why does he sing a song called “Vicky” if his girlfriend is named Roxy?)  The riffing on this film is very good, not the best, but still at the usually high level found in these years of the show.  The host segments are very good too.  I liked Joel’s invention called the Porkerina that produces the pig-like “oinking” sound heard in the soundtracks of shows like Green Acres and Petticoat Junction.  And I especially liked the segment in which J&tBs talk about examples of hell in pop culture and the segment about widowers in ’60s sitcoms.  Overall, this is a very good episode that is enhanced in the Rhino DVD offering.  Definitely recommended.
DVD Details:  The picture quality on the Rhino DVD is quite good, like the other Rhino DVDs, this is the best quality I’ve ever seen on an MST3K episode.  The DVD also has an interesting feature that pops up an icon (a small “Crow” head) in the bottom left corner of the screen.  Pressing the “Select” button when this pops up will branch over to the unMSTed version of the movie and show scenes that were cut from this point of the movie by BBI.  Pushing the “Select” button again branches back to the movie.  Unfortunately, there is no icon during the unMSTed version of the movie to tell you when to branch back, you just have to guess (a drawback, although it’s only really a problem the first time you see this movie).  The only other extras besides that is some info on other MST3K titles available from Rhino.  And, if you consider this an extra, each screen of the “Chapters Index” has different music from the movie, including a couple of the songs of Arch Hall Jr.

Don’s Rating: 

Forrest’s Review:  What a great episode!  This episode is one that simply gets better and better every time I watch it.  The movie is easily one of the filthiest, most disgusting, vile movies on the show, but it is also kind of fun.  Richard Kiel, after his breathtaking roles in Happy Gilmore and The Human Duplicators, stars here as Eegah, a lonely prehistoric giant (more specifically a really tall guy) that can’t get any.  So he is forced to sexually molest Roxy, an young girl who likes to say: “Weeeeeee!!”  A highlighted disgusting moment in this movie would be when Roxy is being molested by Eegah, and her father (played by Arch Hall Sr.) just sits there and watches.  If that wasn’t gross enough, our hero Tom (played by Arch Hall Jr.) shows up in this as an oily, Elvis-wannabe, who likes to sing songs so awful that they rival Whitney Houston on a bad day.  Despite the awfulness, Joel and the Bots riff this puppy to bits and pieces.  The host segments are excellent, as they are filled with pop culture references.  My favorite was the one about Joel and the Bots’ own personal hell.  Also includes excellent invention exchanges, including the Porkerina, which explains how incidental music occurs in old sitcoms like The Beverly Hillbillies, and Dr. F replacing Frank’s blood with radiator fluid!  There is one major highlight in this episode.  Two lizards are having...um...telling secrets, and Tom says, “Oh no, someone is watching!”  And then one of the lizards run away, so the remaining lizard just stares at the screen and Crow blurts out: “What?! Can I help you?”  Well, for me it was hysterical, mostly because of the timing.  This episode is one that repeats well, has outstanding host segments, and reveals what we have all wanted to know for so long: “What is a Sampo?”  This one gets A+ marks from me!

Forrest’s Rating: 

Related Links:
    (1) Mighty Jack’s MST3K Review (Episode Review) 
    (2) The Agony Booth (Humorous Movie Review)
    (3) BadMovies.org (Movie Review) 
    (4) DVD Verdict (Rhino MST3K DVD Disc Review)
    (5) DVD Talk (Rhino MST3K DVD Disc Review)
    (6) DVD Angle (Rhino MST3K DVD Disc Review)
    (7) Current Film (Rhino MST3K DVD Disc Review)